History or Chemistry?
by Little Missus
Summary: During the voyage, Emma wonders about who she belongs with: a pirate with whom sparks fly or a thief who has known her for so long. CaptainSwan and SwanFire. Set during Save Henry (3x09).


Emma secretly crept down to the cabin. She needed a chance to get away from everything, _everyone._ And by everyone, she especially meant the two meant that were fighting over her affection. She sighed and collapsed on the bed. She was glad everybody was currently celebrating and did not notice her gone. "Hello?" a timid voice called out into the cabin. Emma sighed. Almost everyone.

Hovering in the doorway unsurely was Wendy Darling. She stepped into the cabin and noticed the bushed out princess with her disgruntled expression. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disturb you."

"Feeling lonely?" Emma said, although it sounded more like a statement than a question.

"How did you know?" Wendy asked. Although she had known this woman for only a while, a part of her wasn't surprised at her perceptiveness.

"Why else would you come down here? Lonely people like to be left alone at times. They don't have anyone to talk to."

"But you do. You have your family up there."

"Well kid, when you have been separated from them for so long, you'd rather be left alone. I've lived my whole life like that." She found herself frowning at those words. She was surprised to find herself talking to a girl. A little girl who had been trapped under a sadistic teenager with the whole domineering thing going for him.

"That must be hard. To be so long without love." Wendy settled herself on a chair. "I'm sorry. May I stay here?"

"I'm not protesting," Emma nonchalantly replied. A small silence followed.

"Do you know what it's like to be in love?" Wendy asked. Emma was surprised at the question. She raised her head to look at the blond haired girl looking innocently back.

"Why would you ask?" Emma gave her a pondering look. Wendy looked down on the floor and suddenly it hit her. "You're suffering from Stockholm Syndrome," Emma said.

Wendy furrowed her eyebrows together. "What's that?"

"You were or maybe, **are, **in love with Pan."

Wendy didn't deny it and dropped her head to the floor. "Is that so wrong? I've lived there for a really long time and I thought that somewhere deep down..."

Emma sighed. She had seen this look in many people everywhere. That look that girls got when they fell for a guy and were left alone after. She knew that look because it was one she had worn after Neal left her and she ended up going to prison alone. Even if he told her that it was because he wanted her to fulfill his destiny, it still didn't change the fact that she had been left alone all over again.

"Let me give you a bit of advice. Not all boys are...honorable in real life. Many of them are just soulless heartbreakers who don't care. But you, you have to know better. You've spent more than a century cooped up in a cage thanks to a smug boy who thinks he can win. Wendy, you have to find someone better than him." Wendy lifted her face and locked eyes with the woman who happened to be a mother herself. She remembered how many times she didn't want to grow up but after what happened in Neverland, she knew it was time. Emma was right and even if there was a small part deep down that still held out hope for Peter, she knew it was time to give up. She had her brothers to go back to and maybe she might find someone else one day. "Thank you." Wendy stood up and went to one of the beds on the wall across. "Baelfire is lucky to love someone like you." And with that, she climbed into a bed and was soon asleep.

Emma furrowed her eyebrows at Wendy's last statement before settling back into the bed and resorting to glaring at the ceiling. Her mind had turned back to the two men. Those two. Ever since Dark Hollow, she had put off her thoughts about those two and focused on getting Henry back. But now, when they were all returning home. And she had a lot of time on her hands. She tried to imagine her life if she chose one and not the other. She remembered how her mother had told her to open her heart to love but the problem was who would be the one to enter it.

She thought of Neal: her first love and the father of her child. Ever since she reunited with Henry, he was always brought to the forefront of her mind. She could see so much of Neal in him: the love of adventure, the goofiness that made her question their welfare, and the longing to be loved. She always wondered what it would be like to be a real family with both Neal and Henry at her side but then she was afraid.

Afraid. That was what Hook had said about her once. Hook. She knew they had a connection. She felt it ever since that adventure on the beanstalk. Even in Neverland, there were times when she wished she could tell him everything because she knew deep down that he would not chide her or reject her. She could see that he had gone through the same thing. And that kiss. She could still remember everything about it. It felt so passionate and strong, like her. Like him.

She shook her head to clear these thoughts from her head. She needed to rest. For once, she just wanted to lie back and relax. And with that thought, she closed her eyes and drifted off.

* * *

_Emma sucked in a breath as Snow tugged the last laces of the ballgown she had chosen for her. Even though all the residents of Storybrooke had been back at the Enchanted Forest for 3 months, she still had frequent moments where she would compare the world she had grown up in to the world that she should've grown up in. This moment was one of them. _

_"Is this corset really necessary?" Emma questioned, getting a response in the form of a appalled look from her mother. "Emma, of course it is." _

_"But I thought you didn't like corsets." _

_"I didn't but my mother said it was always for the sake of looking proper. Come on, Emma. It's a Christmas Ball. Besides, you look beautiful." Emma took one glance at the mirror and she found herself agreeing with her mom. The dress hugged her figure and the red color complimented her eyes. The neckline wasn't too low to be considered inappropriate nor was it too high to be considered conservative. _

_"And here I thought those princess gowns would be the death of me," she murmured. A few minutes later, she and her mom finished before meeting her dad and Henry in the hallway. Her dad was dressed in his usual outfit for balls but it was outfitted in a green color. Henry wore the exact same thing except his was red. _

_"Hey David," Emma said, smiling at her dad. She ruffled Henry's hair. "Now you look like an actual prince." _

_Henry scratched his neck. "Does it have to be uncomfortable?" _

_Snow chuckled at her daughter and grandson. "Like mother, like son." This statement earned her a glare from both aforementioned. They went towards a red curtain where they heard someone announce their names. The curtain was drawn back and the family entered. Emma raised her head and tried to act like she didn't notice the stares. On the last few steps, she accidentally tripped. _

_But instead of the cold, hard floor beneath her, she felt a strong and familiar pair of arms around her. She glanced up and her heart beat rapidly as she realized who had caught her. "What are you doing here?" _

_Neal smiled as he saw her flustered face. It reminded him of the time they first met. "I was invited. Besides, there's no reason to stop by even if the Princess of the land does not want to see me." _

_Emma glared at him. "I didn't say anything like that." _

_Neal smiled, glad to have drawn this type of reaction from her. "Then why don't you honor me with a dance?" _

_Emma smiled faintly. "Alright, Cassidy. Just this once." She took his hand and he led her out to the dance floor. He pulled her in close to him just as the band started to play a song. Looking at him from this distance, she felt her heart skip a beat. He looked handsome yet different. She was used to the Neal in the modern world but not the one in the Enchanted Forest. He wasn't dressed in the way many of the men were but he still looked good. She could tell it was old, probably modified by his father. _

_Suddenly, they stopped dancing. "Uh, Neal. Why did we stop?" Neal looked confused. He tried to move but he couldn't. It was as if their feet were glued to the floor. Neal glanced up. "Son of-" _

_Emma didn't hear the rest of his statement for she had glanced up and noticed a sprig of mistletoe, it's green leaves looking luscious and it's white berries glowing amongst the many candles in the room. "I have a feeling we won't move until..." She couldn't get the words out. It was too awkward. Ever since they had returned to the Enchanted Forest, they agreed to stay friendly with each other. They were nice but there were moments when Emma wished they didn't have to be like that. When she saw him, she found herself wanting to pick up the pieces. And not just for the sake of their son, but for the sake of remembering why she fell in love with him in the first place. _

_She looked into Neal's eyes. She could see something there. There was worry but she could see that there was also a hint of wanting. And without warning, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers. These kisses, Emma remembered. She still felt everything but this time, it was more tender and more loving. She relished the feeling. The feeling of being with the one who knew her. Who knew her dark side and the other secrets that made her build her walls. He was the only one who could penetrate them. And for some reason, it made her feel safe. _

_They broke apart and she was surprised to see a ring in the same spot the mistletoe was earlier. Neal looked up and plucked it from the air. Tears gathered in his eyes. "It's my mother's ring." _

_Emma suddenly knew where this was going. "Neal, I..." _

_"Emma, it's fine if you don't want to." _

_"No, Neal." She lifted her eyes toward him. "Yes." _

_"What?" _

_"You heard me. I want to be with you." _

_Neal's eyes lit up. "That's actually the one thing I wanted this Christmas." He slipped the ring on her finger. "I love you, Emma. And I'm sorry I didn't realize that until now." _

* * *

Emma's eyes fluttered open. She glanced around and noticed that she was still in the cabin. Instead of feeling the palpitating worry that came with every dawn, she felt a sort of peace. She let it overtake her before falling asleep again.

* * *

_She had taken a ride to the beach near the palace. She didn't care about the snow falling all around her. She let herself off the horse her father had given her as a welcome home gift. It was a white horse with a honey blond mane and she had named it Snow, since that was the first name she could think off. _

_"Well, lass, I never thought you'd be the type to ride horses." Emma turned around to see Killian all decked it in black (as usual). She saw his ship anchored a few miles away. _

_"Not off on some great adventure?" Emma questioned with a slight glare. She had taken to avoiding the pirate ever since she had arrived. _

_"Well, I've ran out of adventures considering my love has frozen up," He gestured to the sea but something in his eyes told her he wasn't really referring to the sea. "What are you doing here anyway?" _

_Emma glanced at him. "Taking a ride." _

_"To help you escape?" He said this matter-of-factly. _

_"What would you know about escaping?" She asked him before mentally slapping herself. She shouldn't have had to ask that, considering he's a pirate. _

_"I'm surprised, perceptive and bloody brilliant as you are, you haven't figured that out." He gave her one of his hard stares that always made her feel like she could tell him anything. _

_"Well, for me, it's escaping from my new life. I still don't feel like I'm cut out to be the princess." _

_"Why? You don't like the fact that people are doing as you wish?" The last three words he had said brought her back to that moment in Neverland. That one moment where everything seemed alright. _

_"People don't do anything I wish. They do what I tell them." _

_"Isn't that the same thing?" Hook questioned. He found himself smiling. He had missed these arguments with her. These little t__ê__te-à-t__ê__tes always made him feel refreshed. _

_"But what I tell them is not what I wish." She fixed him with that sincere gaze he had come to know. He still remembered her giving him that gaze before that...kiss. He felt his legs bring him forward. At that moment, he desperately wished she would say something, anything to confirm that burgeoning hope in his chest. _

_"What do you wish, Swan?" He stepped closer to her, making it all the more easier for them. _

_Emma closed her eyes and before she could say anything, Hook had put his lips to hers. This time, it was Emma who was the most surprised. When she had made the first move, it didn't feel anything like this. This kiss was a fire: warm and passionate, flickering and making her see clearly. She knew that he was who she was meant to be with. She knew it ever since the beanstalk escapade, although she had been too stubborn to pay attention. She now could hear it. He was what she wished for and she was intended to have that wish. _

* * *

"Emma!" A voice jolted her out of her dream. She woke up to find David standing over her. She immediately sat up, wondering if there was any danger she had to face. "What? Is there something wrong?" she asked.

"No. We're back. We're home," David said. They stood there awkwardly for a moment before David went upstairs, muttering something about needing to find Mary Margaret. Emma soon followed him upstairs and from the deck, she could see the shape of Storybrooke coming closer and closer. She felt somebody staring at her and saw both Hook and Neal gazing at her from opposite sides of the ship.

_You're going to have to choose, Emma. _


End file.
